Uchi-deshi (内弟子, ’inside student’)
Uchi Deshi translates to “live in student”. A description or title given to someone who has chosen to live in the dojo and pursue the path of Aikido as their primary purpose while under the supervision of the head teacher. In the early 90s I was invited to become Chiba Senseis Uchi Deshi. It was a major step up in my journey in Aikido and one that would have a profound impact on me. I was not alone in this as 6 or 7 other students had signed up to pursue the same in-depth experience. Most dropped out or were dismissed before completing the program. That in itself was not a surprise when considering the intensity, commitment and standard expected. There was nothing to be ashamed of. It was not for everyone.
Those who completed the program were a tiny number. 3 maybe 4. The others either stopped training altogether or continued under different terms and conditions. After I left there were new students who also moved into the dojo but the terms were different from the old crew. There was a crucial element missing in what would technically qualify as an Uchi Deshi. The terms of training were not unconditional. That is to say they were there for a set period with the knowledge that it would end at a certain point. This could be weeks or months. That is an honourable achievement but it is not Uchi Deshi. The psychology of an open ended regimen is an entirely different experience. It ends when it ends with the resulting depth of experience that cannot be achieved with less stringent arrangements. If you visit for a few weeks or months and then leave and maybe return on another occasion is simply not the same.
In fact I find it silly or childish when I hear someone describe themselves in those terms when they did not fulfil the requirements. There was even a document drafted for those wanting to join the teacher training program, called Kenshusei training. It states the hours and responsibilities expected. The Uchi Deshi who were also Kenshusei had the most extensive requirements on a daily basis and years of professional training. When the terms of training were a few months or at best a year then it was not appropriate to use the title. It was no small achievement doing a limited regimen. It was still a level of commitment, more than many if not most and yet it does not qualify as Uchi Deshi. There is no shame in following the path that one has chosen or was able to do but to constantly embellish it with titles or descriptions that were not given diminishes that achievement and the title itself. There are so many “Uchi Deshi” now that one wonders how Chiba Sensei ever managed to have the time to teach them all. Sometimes it would get silly when “I am his student, his “Uchi Deshi””, based on a seminar, a summer camp or some such. It was not a game and something he took very seriously. Even those who did venture to his dojo and spent a manageable period of time with him were not Uchi Deshi, no matter how much they try to convince themselves. The dynamics between the Sensei and the Uchi Deshi was an entirely different experience. I say this as having been both. Initially as a Kenshusei living outside the dojo and then moving in. The directness of engagement with Chiba Sensei and the impact of that in both training and as a person is more intense, closer and while there in his dojo, virtually all consuming. This was above and beyond just the hours of training which were already an enormous challenge. As Kenshusei or Soto Deshi if you want, you go home. There was space where you can “drop” some of the stuff and breath more. Call it escape. The hours training was less, although still substantial depending on the particular person. There was no right or wrong, or good or bad choices. There was “what you did and what you didn’t do”. Each way had its own qualities which may or may not suit have suited that person.
It is understandable why some people used it. It indicated status or to the uninitiated, someone who is high up in rank or simply knows more than others. These days it is also a marketing initiative. It is however mostly misplaced and over used. To understand this one just has to look into the history of the position and who qualifies as one. Recently I resumed reading a fantastic book by Richard Amos Sensei about his life in the world of Shotokan Karate and it includes a 3 year period when he was living and training at the Tokyo headquarters. Check it out – Chasing Budo: How I Learned to Just Say Osu. There was so much there that I related to and whilst the art and geography as well as the setup differed, the experience had substantial overlap. He made it and would be one of only 3 foreigners to complete the program. That alone should give a clue to the demands of such a program. There were those who didn’t complete it for various reasons and others who didn’t do it at all and yet still use the title. Clearly this is not just an Aikido issue.
At the risk of sounding preachy, I am sure how one has trained, while important, should be followed up with what one does with it. Teaching was my choice and whatever my own past experience, it is history. How the art is transmitted and students developed is more important now. Regardless of what journey a student of Aikido and teacher has taken, or any other study for that matter, we have to live with that and do ones best. The amusing thing and possibly quite revealing for me was how reluctant I was to use the term Uchi Deshi. For many years after I left the program, I never used the title. I rejected the terminology and instead used Professional student. Ultimately this was semantics and cannot alter the experience. I was talking to a fellow Deshi over 10 years ago and wether he recollected the training. He didn’t and I also rarely remembered it with the exception of when I am writing. There was a certain pride in what we achieved. Today at the dojo, “I Just teach”.